August brought a milestone: five years a widow.

Five years since I saw him or heard his voice.

Not...it's just been a year. The hard second year. The challenging third year when cancer showed up. The fourth year dealing with healing and treatment. Five years.

Five years learning to trust God in new ways. Rediscovering His promises with fresh eyes.

Praying scripture that reminds me His strength is made perfect at my weakest point.

Remembering that my heart (and memory) can deceive me, but that He is the Truth.

And above all: We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.(2 Corinthians 10:5) Yes, especially those 3 am thoughts. Rogue memories that take aim at my joy. Now I have more ammo for those enemy attempts. I've been at this awhile.

Five years.

Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things. Philippians 4:8